death: a lament

Last night, one of my friends told me that her fiance's mom had died. An hour ago, I hung up the phone with a guy on my band who told me that his wife's mom just died. That's 2 moms, in less than 24 hours. In one case, it's been an incredibly painful waiting game. In the other, an unexpected, sudden event. I can't really say that I understand, although I have experienced both, because each situation is different.

Death is so painful, rendering the living helpless and dumbfounded. Even though I wasn't close to either of these people, my heart aches for the living, and the journey they've begun. I sat in bed last night, wondering what God's reasons were. I feel like I've been struck dumb. What do you say? What can you say?

And so here is my cry of frustration for the families who have lost mothers, grandmothers, and aunts; for the grandchildren who will never meet grandmothers, for the marriage pictures that will be missing a mother. Here are my tears for the pain that they feel, for the hurt in their hearts, for their sleepless nights and long tiring days.

But here also is my cry to God -- to heal, to bring peace, to use this event to change lives. It's my cry of frustration and anguish, but also of hope and of trust. All I can do from here is give it to God. And so this is my prayer: that these deaths would serve God's greater purpose, and lives would change as a result.

God, be near your hurting children.

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.
Ps34:18.

For You keep track of all my sorrows.
You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
You have recorded each one in your book.
Ps56:8