By popular demand: The Story of the Muffin Fairy.
(which is, in fact, completely true. except for the fairies. but the story line is true. this all happened to me, and I'm not even kidding.)
Dear ma'am,
I recieved your acclaimed "muffin fairies" last week, and decided to put them to work right away. Unfortunately, it appears that my muffin fairies are both defective, and the apple muffin fairy did a crappy job of morphing my fruit into muffins.
Let me illustrate my point with a story: (a true story)
My apple muffin fairy came up with this really great idea that the soft apples should be made into apple cream cheese muffins. This was a great idea. So, the apples were cut up into tiny little pieces, and the muffin fairy realized that she had double the amount of apples that she needed. no worries. then the apple fairy put the butter in the microwave to melt it, just as the recipe said. So she pulled out a block of butter from the fridge and put it in the pyrex and melted it down. Unfortunately, when she went to pour the butter into the mixer, she neglected to LOOK at the amount of butter that was melted. It was 1/2, not 1/4. And then, the muffin fairy added the apples to the batter (almost all of the DOUBLE amount of apples), and mixed evrything together. Unfortunately, the silly apple muffin fairy forgot to buy another muffin tin. So the muffin fairy spent the next 2 1/2 hours making her 18 muffins in a muffin tin of 6 cups. She had to bake 3 tins of muffins so that they could all be done by the time she wanted to go to bed.
When the muffins were done, a few things became apparent. First, the muffin tin was new, and did not have a built up layer of grease to keep the muffins from sticking, and the mufffin fairy did not grease her muffin tin. Second, because of the extra ingredients, the muffins fell apart instantaneously without holding together in the slightest. SO, the muffin fairy ended up with a 3 tins of muffin pieces.
Stupid Apple Muffin Fairy. Fortunately for her, the muffins taste good, and that saved her from being thrown out into the frost for her poor job in the kitchen.
The Banana Muffin Fairy is also defective, as she HID MY BANANAS IN THE COAT CLOSET for 2 days before I found them. How am I supposed to eat my bananas when I can't even find them?? How are they supposed to be morphed later if they're missing??
My muffin fairies are defective. I would like to SEND THEM BACK for a full refund, or replacement fairies. I would also like to request a new dinner fairy, as mine seems to have run away from home.
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Sincerely,
an unhappy muffin fairy recipient
Dear ma'am,
I recieved your acclaimed "muffin fairies" last week, and decided to put them to work right away. Unfortunately, it appears that my muffin fairies are both defective, and the apple muffin fairy did a crappy job of morphing my fruit into muffins.
Let me illustrate my point with a story: (a true story)
My apple muffin fairy came up with this really great idea that the soft apples should be made into apple cream cheese muffins. This was a great idea. So, the apples were cut up into tiny little pieces, and the muffin fairy realized that she had double the amount of apples that she needed. no worries. then the apple fairy put the butter in the microwave to melt it, just as the recipe said. So she pulled out a block of butter from the fridge and put it in the pyrex and melted it down. Unfortunately, when she went to pour the butter into the mixer, she neglected to LOOK at the amount of butter that was melted. It was 1/2, not 1/4. And then, the muffin fairy added the apples to the batter (almost all of the DOUBLE amount of apples), and mixed evrything together. Unfortunately, the silly apple muffin fairy forgot to buy another muffin tin. So the muffin fairy spent the next 2 1/2 hours making her 18 muffins in a muffin tin of 6 cups. She had to bake 3 tins of muffins so that they could all be done by the time she wanted to go to bed.
When the muffins were done, a few things became apparent. First, the muffin tin was new, and did not have a built up layer of grease to keep the muffins from sticking, and the mufffin fairy did not grease her muffin tin. Second, because of the extra ingredients, the muffins fell apart instantaneously without holding together in the slightest. SO, the muffin fairy ended up with a 3 tins of muffin pieces.
Stupid Apple Muffin Fairy. Fortunately for her, the muffins taste good, and that saved her from being thrown out into the frost for her poor job in the kitchen.
The Banana Muffin Fairy is also defective, as she HID MY BANANAS IN THE COAT CLOSET for 2 days before I found them. How am I supposed to eat my bananas when I can't even find them?? How are they supposed to be morphed later if they're missing??
My muffin fairies are defective. I would like to SEND THEM BACK for a full refund, or replacement fairies. I would also like to request a new dinner fairy, as mine seems to have run away from home.
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Sincerely,
an unhappy muffin fairy recipient
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